Thia [Eldritch Slice of Life]

by cactusroomIs this yours?

Chapter 50 - It is joined by friends

6 min read

Chapter 50 - It is joined by friends


Chapter 50 – It is joined by friends


Gabe: “Holy shit, this place has absolutely badass decor.”


Hayley: “No, no, no, no. Stop that, you. Stop talking... you're going to bring them bad luck.”


Gabe: “What? It's seriously cool as hell. I'd love to use this place as a set. Thia’s got good taste.”


Hayley: “No, no, no. Don't reinforce the numerology. It's super inauspicious.”


Alex: “Hey guys, what's up? What numerology? Is there mercury in the gatorade or something?”


Hayley: “June 6th, 2022. It's totally 666... so try not to say anything unlucky that might invite any bad intentions, guys.”


Darcy: “That's metal.”


Hayley: “Oh my gosh! Don't make devil horns inside a church.”


Darcy: “It fit the vibe.”


Alex: “She's kind of right. This is a church in the same way that a slaughterhouse is a theme park.”


Darcy: “Hell yeah.”


Hayley: “Darcy!”


Darcy: “(hell yeah).”


Chloe: “I don't think she meant that you should say it more quietly..."


Darcy: “Oops. Not hell yeah.”


Chloe: “Darcy... Also hi everyone.”


Alex: Hey, Chloe. Nice cosplay.”


Chloe: "...Did none of the boys dress up? I... thought it was a costume wedding. I feel kind of embarrassed now.”


Ian: “Nah, mate. Don't be. That guy's literally a buddhist monk. And there's like 30 people who look like devils. You're fine.”


Darcy: “I have spare horns if anyone wants.”


Alex: “Pass.”


Ian: “Yeah, sure. Why not.”


Chloe: “Why do you have a bag of spare horns?”


Darcy: “I thought it'd be funny.”


Chloe: “Pfft. You're so bad.”


Ian: “It's funny. Can confirm.”


Alex: “Screw it. Pass me a pair. I'll join in on the fun.”


Gabe: “Okay. Me too, then.”


Chloe: Do you have enough for everybody? We could do a whole class theme.”


Darcy: “Yup.”


Chloe: “You're really bad... but give me a pair too. I'll swap the cat ears.”


Hayley: “I'll have to pass, sorry. I feel like it's a big cosmic nono to wear horns in a church on a wedding day with triple six numerology.”


🖤███ : “Friends of the brides, I presume? I'm the Officiant, Lulu. I just wanted to say that I think your group theme is wonderful, and I'm sure the brides will be delighted to see your collective getup.”


All: “...”


🖤███ : “Do you happen to have an extra set of horns I could borrow? I find the thought of wearing them quite amusing. I will, of course, pay you back in full.”


Darcy: “Huh? Yeah, sure.”


🖤███ : “Thank you, friend of the bride. I'd like you to have this in return. A token of my gratitude. I'm sure that you'll find a use for it one of these days.”


Darcy: “Huh? A coin? Sure, okay.”


🖤███ : “Wonderful theme, once again. It truly brings a smile to the face and joy to the heart.”


All: “...”


🖤███ : “Alas, there are many other guests to greet so I must bid you farewell here, friends of the brides. May you enjoy the wedding and all the festivities to follow. Thank you for the horns. I hope to see you soon.”


All: “... “


Hayley: “Holy hell. Give me a set of horns too.”


Alex: “Guys... I'm not gay, but that was the hottest guy I've ever seen. Would.”


Gabe: “Would.”


Darcy: “Would.”


Hayley: “Would.”


Chloe: “Would.”


Ian: “You guys are animals. Keep in mind that this is a church, yeah? But also: would.”


Ellie: “Hey guys, nice horns. What'd I miss?”


Chloe: “Hi Ellie. You just missed it. The priest might actually be the hottest guy in the entire universe.”


Ellie: “Be right back.”


All: “...”


Ellie: “Holy mother of Jesus. Would. Darcy give me some horns.”


Darcy: "...Why do you think it was me?”


Ellie: "...Seriously?”


Darcy: “Okay, fine.”


Ellie: “Thanks. Looking good, girls. Boys... seriously? Do better. Don't you see everyone else dressed up?”


Gabe: “I thought the invite meant to wear a colourful suit or something.”


Ellie: “It's been over 10 years and you still can't read?”


Gabe: “How was I supposed to know it was a full on dress up thing?”


Chloe: “Well... the invite said so..."


Ian: “Classic Gabe. How did you even become a director when you can't read?”


Gabe: “Okay, if you're so smart then why are you just in a regular suit?”


Ian: “Mate, I read the invite and chose to come dressed straight. We are not the same.”


Alex: “I was just too scared to dress up so I copped out. I thought about it, though.”


Gabe: “I can read.”


Darcy: “Rich people don’t say they're rich.”


Chloe: “It's okay, Gabe. The ‘whole language’ reading approach made a lot of people illiterate. It's not just you.”


Gabe: “Guys, I can actually read.”


Ellie: “Wow, almost everyone else is dressed up, huh? They really went all in.”


Chloe: “Amy’s a big writer now, so those are probably all her writer friends. I heard artists were all pretty eccentric.”


Ellie: “I mean, okay. But there's eccentric, and there's mini godzilla.”


Chloe: “I think mini godzilla is really cute! Maybe it's somebody's kid all dressed up?”


Hayley: “I guess a lot of their friends have kids? There's even an entire fairy and gnome section.”


Chloe: “Aww, they're so small and sparkly.”


Alex: “Do you think those guys will let me play with their swords?”


Darcy: “Phrasing.”


Alex: “I mean it. They're so cool. That whole section is just filled with guys with giant swords and spears.”


Darcy: “Phrasing.”


Alex: “Stop that.”


Gabe: “Everyone's costumes are so good. I wonder how they did it. Some of them have, like, professional prosthetics going on.”


Ellie: “The first step was probably actually reading the invitation and making preparations.”


Gabe: “I can read.”


Alex: “It's okay, man. We know you're a good guy even if you're a little illiterate.”


Gabe: “Guys, I can read.”


Ian: “Clackin’ wheels, even Thia’s friends are hilarious. Did you see Vishnu talking to that octopus guy?”


Gabe: “Poseidon?”


Ian: “Nah, mate. Poseidon's over there in the Greek corner. I'm talking about the octopus guy.”


Gabe: “What octopus—holy hell. That freaking octopus.”


Ian: “Hilarious, right? This wedding’s going to be a banger.”


♢♢♢


Amy: “Are you sure we're going to be okay without any rehearsal? Isn't there normally a rehearsal for these things? Is it really going to be okay? I'm nervous out of my mind. Thia, let me recharge my Thiameter.”


🖤███ : “Yes, dear bride. Everything will turn out just fine even without a rehearsal. In fact, I would suggest that the less time you spend within this Domain of mine, the better.”


Amy: “Charging. Charging. Charging. But what if I mess up and ruin everything?”


“It will take the lead. Amy does not have to worry about Anything.”


Amy: “Squee.”


“Amy’s soul is properly housed.”


Amy: “Thia, you're so powerful today.”


“It confirms. It will likely have to protect It's Wife from those wishing to cause Overall Harm.”


“So fierce... Squee.”


“Amy's soul is properly housed.”


🖤███ : “Are the brides fully charged? The guests have all arrived and settled. It's almost time for your entry.”


Amy: “Phew... I'm ready.”


“It is ready.”


🖤███ : “Then, at your leisure. I'll be waiting for you at the altar.”


Amy: “Phew... okay. Just one more hug and I'll be good to go.”


“It accepts the premise. Continue.”


Amy: “Love you.”


“It accepts the premise. Continue”


“After we're married.”



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