Ch 48. Boyz Night
John stood outside his apartment tree and looked out on the street. Ben had said that he, Rene, and Eric were on the way with their transportation for the evening. He was still… uneasy about it. He and Ben had spent a bit more time together since they’d talked and things had been going smoother. Ben seemed to really be trying to be better, and John appreciated it. He was a bit more concerned about spending the time with Eric. The man was older, and as crotchety as they come. He’d softened a bit since he’d started to go to the arena fights. He favored the Red Team pretty highly. The dwarven friends he’d made had started working with him on new pest control techniques that had made it so he could restart his business. He’d switched from poisoning gremlins and brownies to catch and release, which people much preferred. Rene would be easy. He was a very calm and sweet person that always acted as a solid social buffer no matter the situation. None of that was insurmountable. What was difficult for him was that he’d never really been one of the ‘boyz’ even back on Earth and he wasn’t entirely sure what it would entail.
Sure he’d hung out with other men before, but he’d always favored groups of men and women together or even just women. Still, Ben and the others were excited and he’d been working hard on planning everything, so he was going to give it his best shot.
There was a loud neigh from across the road and John looked to see a carriage approaching. It was being drawn by two black stallions with fire for eyes whose every hoofprint was left in a trail of fire behind them. Their reins were held by a man in a black suit of armor with bright flames painted on the side of it, and the carriage itself was long and black with a flame pattern that perfectly matched that of the driver. It looked like something Guy Fieri would wear as a t-shirt, and John knew immediately that Ben had chosen it.
The carriage rolled over to stop right in front of him and the door burst open to Ben smiling ear to ear, which was rather wide in his monstrous form, and wearing a red shirt that said “Boyz Night” across the front of it.
“Ready for Boyz Night, bro?”
John hesitated for just a moment. He could still feign an illness and stay in bed reading for the night. It would be avoidant and shitty, but his bed was tremendously comfortable even if he’d had to replace his hammock to get it. He took a deep breath. He could fight it, and have a bad time that brings the others down, or he could just lean in and do his best to have fun.
“Hell yeah,” he replied with a smile.
“That’s what I like to hear,” Ben held out a hand and drew John inside where he saw Rene and Eric already seated with cold mugs of beer in their hands and their own Boyz Night t-shirts.
John climbed into the carriage finding it bigger on the inside than the outside. The interior decor was as gaudy and outrageous as the exterior with fuzzy black seating and enchanted smoke free torches lit in each corner. He took a seat and Eric handed him a beer with a solemn nod like he’d just passed him a bible.
He took a long sip and looked at Ben, pointing at his shirt. “You got one of those for me?” he asked.
“Hell yeah brother,” Ben replied, tossing him a green Boyz Night shirt which he donned over his button down shirt reminding him of so many scene kids he’d known in high school.
John felt the carriage gently start to move forward, but his beer didn’t shift in the glass. Enchanted not to spill it seemed. He took another long sip before looking at the others.
“So, what’s first?” he asked.
“Food, booze, and women!” said Ben with a smile.
“If it’s the red-glow district I think that might be an easy way for all of us to get in trouble…except for Eric.”
“I’ve got a girl,” replied the older man.
“I stand corrected, and nicely done,” he said, holding out his glass which Eric clanged his own against.
“She’s a fancy lady. Has a castle in the clouds. Likes to watch the fights with me.”
Rene and John exchanged surprised looks. “Very nicely done,” corrected John.
“None of us have to worry,” said Ben with a smile. “It’s not in the red-glow district… it’s just… on the border of it.”
John had some reservations about that statement, but he’d made the personal vow that he’d be a good sport and he intended to follow through.
The carriage came to a stop about two beers later and they all stepped out into the cold evening. In front of them was a bustling restaurant with a line spilling a few yards out of the front door. It was two stories high, with bright enchanted lights glowing in front of it in the shape of a well endowed Elven woman holding two frothy beers. The sign below the glowing image read Elitiri’s Jugs. He saw a few young, attractive girls get let past the line wearing incredibly tight tops and shorts.
“Oh my god, you found Avalon’s equivalent of hooters,” said John.
“Hell yeah I did,” responded Ben with a wide tusky smile.
“You’re a good man,” said Eric, giving Ben a firm pat on the back.
“There were a few places like this in Paris,” said Rene. “Though I only ever saw them from the outside.”
“Well this time you get to take a good long gander inside, my froggy friend,” replied Ben as he started to walk toward the door.
They followed him, getting a few dirty looks from the lines as Ben pushed through them like a battering ram to reach the hostess, an elven woman that was a dead ringer for the glowing sign in the front.
“Ben! Welcome back! We already have the table ready for you.”
“Nice. Thanks El.”
She nodded, and gestured for them to follow, her hips moving in such an exaggerated way that John found himself a bit hypnotized in spite of himself, only barely managing to look away so that he could look around at the rest of the restaurant. Every table was packed with men and women. The interior decor was simple, likely so that you’d keep your eyes on the servers, and the food at every table looked exceptional and the tankards were all filled to the brim. He’d never enjoyed the softcore style restaurants all over the states, but then again they’d never had actually good food or girls with horns and pointed ears.
El sat them at a circular table in the corner and within moments two beautiful servers, a demoness with pink skin and long black hair in a ponytail, and a dwarven woman with freckles and red hair, appeared with pitchers of beer and plates piled high with some kind of circles of fried something that smelled delicious two beers into the night and would likely smell even better after John downed another one.
John found himself watching the pink demon server leave as he sipped his beer.
“I asked for them myself,” said Ben with a smile at them. “I figured I could guess your types pretty accurately.”
Rene shook his head. “I didn’t really like dwarven women any more or less before I met Esme. I have to admit though,” he watched the dwarven server coming back. “They have a certain je ne sais quoi.”
“So,” said the dwarven server, the demoness at her shoulder, shooting a wink to John that made him blush. He had some guesses as to what kind of demon she was. “What can we get for you strapping men?”
What followed was three more beers, two plates piled high with fried foods of all kinds that included cockatrice wings, drake steaks, and bullywug legs the size of arms. While John enjoyed the eye candy, in spite of his beliefs that he was better than that, he enjoyed the food even more and had absolutely stuffed himself by the time they were stumbling out into the cool evening air. His face red and sweat had started to stain his collar.
“Good start, eh boyz?” asked Ben.
“It was good,” replied John. “Not sure if I’ll be able to make the walk to the carriage though. You may just have to roll me there.”
Ben laughed. “Don’t worry, the next stop will help you work all that off.”
“Oh?” asked Rene.
Ben just smiled as he flagged down their carriage from earlier, the man in full armor folded a newspaper he’d somehow been reading in the dark and brought it over to them where they could awkwardly clamber inside with full bellies and blurred vision.
It was only two more beers before they reached their next destination and Eric let out a rare smile as they stepped out. They were in front of the arena. John had never seen it in the dark, and the lack of throngs of people made the building look almost naked.
“John!” yelled a familiar voice from the entrance.
John looked to see Hargreeve standing and waving at them, his massive orcish frame practically blocking the entire entrance.
“Hargreeve!” John responded, waving as they all approached.
Hargreeve raised an eyebrow as they approached. “It seems you’re all a bit in your cups this evening, eh?”
“How tell can you?” asked Ben jokingly, adding a bit of slurring to his speech for good measure.
“What is this?” John asked, aiming his question at Ben and Hargreeve.
The gladiator gestured for them to follow and they all fell in line behind him.
“Your friend Ben here asked me if I’d be willing to help you and some friends have a little fun in the arena. Since you helped me out, I thought I’d help him out a bit.”
John frowned and looked at Ben. He hadn’t told him anything about Hargreeve being a patient.
“And how did you meet?”
“Waiting room,” replied Ben. “My appointment was after his a few times.”
John nodded, satisfied with that answer.
“Is it some kind of underground match?” asked Eric, excitement tinging his voice. “I thought your last bout against the thirty gnomes was exceptional by the way.”
John smiled. He’d never heard Eric so excited. He really lived for the arena.
“You could call it underground,” replied Hargreeve with a smile as he pushed open the last door opening it, not to a private box, but the ground of the arena itself. “And thanks. Those little bastards were surprisingly strong though. Felt bad about the one I kicked into the crowd.”
They all stepped into the center of the arena and looked out at the empty seats.
“Wow,” said Rene as he did a spin and looked out at everything.
Ben was smiling smugly. “The exciting part hasn’t even started yet.” He nodded at Hargreeve.
Hargreeve cupped both of his hands around his mouth. “Alright, let’s get it started!” he yelled.
There was the sound of a staff slamming onto stone and very suddenly the stands filled with thousands of ephemeral humanoid shapes of all shapes, sizes, and colours and they were all screaming and roaring at them.
John actually fell backward in surprise and Ben held out a hand to help him back to his feet. Aside from the roaring crowd there were also dozens of similar translucent figures in the arena with them, all holding weapons and shields in a circle around them. Just in front of them were dozens of swords, shields, spears, and every other kind of weapon they could imagine.
“This is a training method gladiators use to get used to a crowd and the arena itself,” said Hargreeve with a smile. “The enemies are set to be very very weak for you, but should still throw a strike or two. The pain you feel from their attacks is down at five percent. You have all night to be the best gladiator you can be.”
John shook his head. This was silly. The equivalent of children playing with foam swords, just with better effects. Still, his eyes were drawn to a trident stuck in the ground just a few feet from him, and he had said he would be a good sport.